Wednesday, 11 March 2009

I will write

I was thinking the other day about the films I'd like to make. I often watch a movie and think "shit, wish I'd have written that". Now there is such a thing as stealing an idea. If you've been up to date on my blogging of late you'll have noticed my fascination with the shiny WATCHMEN, so if I were to write a film about a time when superheros are outlawed, then one is killed and there's a blue naked guy and Jeffrey Dean Morgan in a funny mask and a BLOODY TIGER.....erm.....where was I? Ah yes - so if I were to write a film like that, a few people may notice something wrong.

So rule 1 - never blog about the film you're going to rip off. "What, you mean there's already a film about a time travelling cybernetic organism (not robot) who is trying to kill the future saviour of mankind before he's even born? THERE'S THREE?! No, I swear to god I've never heard of that Arnold Sch...what's his name again?"

That's a joke by the way. No laughs? Getting bored? Ok, on with the bloginess.

So here's a list of films - or types of films - I would one day like to make:
  • A Western - I have a small idea but nothing original. One day my friends, one day.
  • A space adventure - in the works, but hasn't been touched in months.
  • A zombie film - got a TV show in the early stages and I did have a film idea, but it's died.
  • A superhero movie - now as much as I'd like to write a full-on geek fest, I won't. It's going to be a film that will (hopefully) make THE PUNISHER and WATCHMEN look like Saturday morning cartoons.
  • A "I'm an ex-military guy, don't fuck with me" movie - there are lots around, one of the best being TAKEN. Fuck with a guy's family, bring the thunder!
  • A whodunit mystery - Gruff cop, witty sidekick.
  • A martial arts action epic - pull no punches (pun intended), all-out, unrealistic taekwondo, kung fu, ninjitsu, tai chi action.
  • A high adventure - stick me in a mythical, magical world with orcs, wizards, unicorns and possibly a Conan-esque character - film writes itself.
  • A great kids' animation - something fun but with unpatronising action. For the kids, but a guilty pleasure for the tall folk.
  • A tragedy - I have a very private idea in mind. Basically, I'll take aspects of my life and turn them into a full blown tragedy.
  • A classical piece - I know a lot about the ancient world (Greeks and Romans) as well as the Vikings. Might as well put it to good use.
  • Ancient gods, modern world - need I say more?
So.....not much there then. Delusions of grandeur I hear you say? Nonsense. If you don't try, you'll never know. If any of those are still not ticked off when I die, consider me an "unfinished business" ghost.

Shiny writing.

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